I read the story before looking at the note, and yes, it was immediately clear that he is a vampire. Also there was no need for a transition between the reflection on human burial rituals and then him standing above his wife's grave. We already know that he's at the cemetery, so the way I read it, he was having these reflections while already standing at his wife's grave. The only part that didn't make sense was the grave being millennia old... a few centuries, sure, maybe, but there is no cemetery today that has graves from thousands of years ago - even old unmarked graves.
but anyway, great story.
As far as I'm concerned too little description will always beat too much description, unless of course the description is important to the plot
Thanks for reading the story as well as your thoughtful comment on the writer's note. My observation about the transition came about because at no point did I say anything about him moving through the cemetery, just standing at the gate, but perhaps as you observed, it's implied that he's doing so.
The millennia thing is totally an oversight and a case of me using a word without thinking about it, but hey, that's why we review and rewrite! If I do rewrites or expansions, that will be addressed.
I totally agree with you; better to have too little than too much. That said, I do think the tiniest bit of context would benefit this story, even if it's only an additional sentence or two.
I have to admit some more of the backstory would have helped me in this one. I did pick up that his love was human, and that he was vampire, but I didn’t understand they were married. I appreciate your Writer’s Note of the story, because it fills in more info. i agree with you and think a longer piece might suit this story better.
I read the story before looking at the note, and yes, it was immediately clear that he is a vampire. Also there was no need for a transition between the reflection on human burial rituals and then him standing above his wife's grave. We already know that he's at the cemetery, so the way I read it, he was having these reflections while already standing at his wife's grave. The only part that didn't make sense was the grave being millennia old... a few centuries, sure, maybe, but there is no cemetery today that has graves from thousands of years ago - even old unmarked graves.
but anyway, great story.
As far as I'm concerned too little description will always beat too much description, unless of course the description is important to the plot
Thanks for reading the story as well as your thoughtful comment on the writer's note. My observation about the transition came about because at no point did I say anything about him moving through the cemetery, just standing at the gate, but perhaps as you observed, it's implied that he's doing so.
The millennia thing is totally an oversight and a case of me using a word without thinking about it, but hey, that's why we review and rewrite! If I do rewrites or expansions, that will be addressed.
I totally agree with you; better to have too little than too much. That said, I do think the tiniest bit of context would benefit this story, even if it's only an additional sentence or two.
I have to admit some more of the backstory would have helped me in this one. I did pick up that his love was human, and that he was vampire, but I didn’t understand they were married. I appreciate your Writer’s Note of the story, because it fills in more info. i agree with you and think a longer piece might suit this story better.